When God yells at me.

Today I walked past a lady and knocked her purse slightly as I tried to avoid someone coming the opposite way on the sidewalk. I said "excuse me", but clearly I should have shouted it at her instead, because as I continued down the sidewalk, the following was shouted at my back:


Fair enough. But I don't think he likes bad grammar either. It was all I could do not to correct her...but in the interests of NOT being thrown off the Island, and because living here for 1.5 years has granted me the ability to take a LOT of SHIT, I just continued on.

Business as usual.

What I am loving RIGHT NOW.

1. The beach! Yes, beach season has officially begun. I spent a few hours yesterday afternoon sleeping off a minor hangover in the sand, the rays beating down on my back. The tricky part? Avoiding tan lines. My wedding dress just will not allow for it. Must. Remember. This. And there is nothing better than that post-shower feeling after a day on the beach. The downside? Parts of my body that have not seen UV rays since 2008 are the colour of steamed chicken.

2. My new book club. In an attempt to become more literary, I have joined a book club. I tried this once before, in Ottawa, but it was kind of short-lived. Luckily, this time around I seem to have teamed up with some VERY KEEN READERS (I don't actually know them....they are friends of friends), so maybe their constant barrage of Fbook messages will actually get me reading regularly again. OR...piss me off and make me quit. Either way, I'm excited.

3. The fact that I haven't heard a peep from my tenants in months. Excellent. I guess that means that the windows didn't blow in during the winter.

4. Visitors! Our first visitors of the year, my best friend Iza and her husband Kris, are arriving on Wednesday for a fun-filled (and hopefully sun-filled) week of scootering around, some golf, some bachelorette fun (Rock-style), and lots of quality time. So. Excited.

5. My new glasses. I had no idea how much I was NOT seeing until I put these on for the first time. Trees and signs are no longer blurry and I can finally read work presentations. The bad news? I can finally read work presentations.

6. An extra hour of work. Seriously, it sounds weird, but going to work an hour earlier has made a HUGE difference to how much I can get done in the day. Arriving minutes before my boss means that the barrage of work coming out of her office starts pretty much as soon as I log into my computer and gulp down my banana. Now, I spend one luxurious hour going through my notes from the day before, attacking my inbox like a crazy person and chipping away at the steadily climbing pile of work. I feel like I've just learned to swim. We'll see how long this lasts.

7. The word "barrage". I have used it twice so far in this post. Let's see if I can squeeze out a magic number 3.

8. Salads. At this time of year, I stop making my weekly soups and switch to salads. For the past month, I have been very into coleslaw. Not the creamy kind...I make healthy versions, in mutiple varieties. I have probably eaten more cabbage in the past few weeks than in the entire past 5 years, but I'm not sick of it yet. I suppose you could say that Kurt has survived a BARRAGE of coleslaw. Yessssssssssssssss.

9. Fitness goals. The wedding countdown is ON and I calculated that I have already wasted nearly $160 on my yet-to-be-used gym membership. Time to get cracking. Or running.

10. Green smoothies. I go to bed dreaming of my morning green smoothie. So much nutrition packed into one delicious glass...tomorrow's will have bananas, blueberries, an orange and a multitude of add-ins, like spirulina and coconut. Maybe a stalk of celery, if I'm feeling wild. They keep me going until almost lunch time and give me as much energy as a cup of the (revolting) office coffee. I'm trying to eat raw for breakfast and lunch and then have a partially cooked dinner because it just feels good...especially as the weather gets hot.

Sneaky Buggers.

In the weeks leading up to my trip home, there was some talk amongst my bridesmaids and maid of honour and myself about getting together while I was in town, since I'd be there over Easter and the two who live in Vancouver, Iza and Kathie, would be home in Victoria with their families for the long weekend. And then, abruptly, I heard nothing more about it. I chalked it up to the fact that I am a terrible communicator and hadn't been checking in, so I figured I would just sort it out when I got to town. After a surprise brunch with the four of them on my first day, I figured that was it for fun bridal party activities for this trip BUT...they fooled me. Lai told me that her and Heather were picking me up for a morning at the spa, which they did the next day. What they didn't tell me was that one by one, all of my amazing Victoria girlfriends would be showing up to join us. I was sitting there getting my pedicure when Iza walked in...and then Kathie...and then Alayna...and then it was like a steady stream of all of my favorite Victoria people, one after the other, including Tricia, who flew up from San Francisco.

I've known Lai since birth. Kelsey and I shared a bedroom...and parents. Izabela and I shared junior high sleepovers and ridiculous amounts of note-passing. Both Heathers, Tricia and Alayna I've known since late junior high/high school. Eliza has been a part of my extended family since Lai and Dal got together 11 years ago and Kathie and I met in college, moved to Ottawa and lived together in the Byward Market.
It was quite the partay.

After manicures/pedicures, we moved on to my sister's new amazing house in James Bay. Her and her Swede have rented a gorgeous heritage house that I would gnaw off my right arm to own (or just live in) and she volunteered her living room (and kicked out her four male roommates) for us to drink wine, eat snacks, gossip and catch up. It was awesome. Especially because when I looked around the room, I noted that the group of us were never all friends...I was the only connection between most of them. Many of them hadn't seen each other since I left Victoria and what was so neat was that it was SUCH a fun group to hang out with. I guess there are certain qualities that all of my friends possess...they are all hilarious in different ways and they are all very laid back.
From there, I was taken to an "adult entertainment" store, where we were treated to a rundown of the top ten sellers in various types of adult entertainment paraphenalia, including (but not limited to) games, costumes, edibles, apparatus and a lot of things that require batteries. It was fairly hilarious.

After that gongshow, we moved on to a local nightclub (which will quite possibly be the scene of the Kris and Kurt Wedding Afterparty...because that would also be fairly hilarious) for some Velvet, a wicked Victoria band which includes my beloved cousin in-law, Dal. We danced. Had shots. I tried to pass off the boa but it kept coming back. Kathie fell off a couch. Just your standard Sunday night.

I finally left when I lost my voice, just before 1:00.

I'm still so surprised and touched that so much planning went into this, and how much work it would have been to round everyone up and coordinate everything. Everyone had such a great time...especially me. It was such a treat to be surrounded by my girls. Even though, in a perfect world, there would have been a few more faces around me (namely Shan, Deb and my girls here on the Rock), I'm looking forward to a certain evening a few months down the road when this might be the case...

I really couldn't ask for a better group of friends. Or a better LOOKING group of friends.

The whole day/night was planned and coordinated by Kelsey and Laila. My sister and cousin, and built-in best friends. Thanks ladies! You're both amazing.

Love, me.

Back to the land of the living.

I woke up this morning feeling roughly 70% of my normal, well self, and so decided that that was enough to warrant an attempt at a workday. I did OK. I left an hour early because I was fading quickly and didn't want to spend tomorrow re-doing work I did today. All in all though, not terrible. It's nice to have a job that I don't dread going back to after a vacation. Even though it's busy and crazy and my inbox is a total nightmare, I like the people enough that I was looking forward to getting back into the game.

So, I went off to work in some new clothes (thank you, Hudson's Bay Company) and sporting my new glasses which not only make me look, like, so much smarter (I was actually told this...and I'm not sure yet if that's a compliment)...but they have proved just how blurry my world has been for the past few years. I can read signs. And nothing has a fuzzy edge. No wonder car rides started making me nauseous...my world was fading out and I was just too lazy to get my eyes checked every year. Mind you, my prescription is not strong at all...just enough to help me differentiate a 3 from an 8 or an S. It's like a whole new world.

Now that my brain is no longer focused on mucus reduction, I can reflect on my trip home.

What trip? Oh right...that week I spent buzzing around Victoria in my Mom's SmartCar, planning our wedding. Did I mention that we planned the entire event in essentially four days? Right. I am totally in the wrong line of work. We cupcaked and flowered and dressed and sampled and decorated...total pros.
It was so nice to be home and Victoria was at it's finest. The cherry blossoms were out all over the city and, while they started falling near the end of my week, I had plenty of opportunities to stop and stare and wonder why I never noticed how beautiful they are when I lived there. The trees line the street my parents live on and it has to be the prettiest street in the city when the blossoms come out.

Besides the frantic wedding planning, I also managed to have an awesome full day/night stagette (post to come), attended a New Kids on the Block concert, got to most of my favorite stores, saw most of my favorite people, and spent some quality time with the abandoned cat. It was a busy week, but it was so, so nice to be home.

100% Illin'.

I woke up on Saturday, my last day in Victoria, with a wicked cold. Sore throat, some post-nasal drip....it was coming on fast. Unfortunately, my flight home was a redeye, meaning that I knew ahead of time that I would be missing a night of sleep. Not ideal in the best of times, but definitely extra crappy when you're sick. Of course, I was also seated next to a couple of 18 year olds who insisted on making out from Vancouver all the way to Toronto, occasionally bumping me with an elbow or a knee...it was unpleasant. I fell asleep as soon as I walked in my door at noon on Sunday, and have pretty much been in bed ever since. Yuck! I hate being sick. It's been a long time since I've caught a bug that I haven't been able to shake off (or sleep off, rather) in a day or so.

I haven't felt much like eating, but I have fired up the blender a few times to try to force some nutrients down. My elixir of choice? Green smoothies, packed with nutritious ingredients and immune boosters.

See how green that is? We didn't actually have any fresh greens in the house, so this smoothie is fortified with a teaspoon of organic raw spirulina powder, which is derived from blue-green algae and is GREAT for your immune system and full of good stuff. It's the darkest green you can imagine...almost black...and doesn't add any flavour to the smoothie, just good stuff. The other ingredients are 1.5 bananas, a fresh tangelo, some frozen blueberries, a scoop of chia seeds, some raw organic shredded coconut and a tablespoon or so of organic hemp seeds, with a sprinkle of raw organic cacao nibs on top. Delicious. It's no chicken noodle soup, but I think my body needs this stuff more anyways.


Tonight, my 1990-ish self had her number one dream fulfilled. I saw Donnie Walberg's boxers. And...they had a maple leaf on them. And Danny has a tattoo.

The NKOTB concert fulfilled every expectation I had, and then some. There was some Step By Step, some Cover Girl and definitely some Hangin' Tough. There was some dancing, and some people wearing homemade shirts (complete with puffy paint, I might add). I don't think it gets much better. Wait...did I mention Grower's Cider in a plastic cup? Oh.

I have seen a lot of concerts. This one ranks in the top three, for sure. Effin' brilliant.


I'm wide awake and shouldn't be, since I was wide awake at 5:00 a.m. local time (my brain thought it was 9:00) and have had a FULL day.

Mom and I hit the ground running this morning and grabbed coffee/blueberry crisp for breakfast at my favorite little coffee nook, the Parsonage, and then headed to the mall to fill my glasses prescription. Or, that was the plan, until I found myself wanting to punch the salesgirl in the face and had to leave the store to prevent this from happening. I have never met a more annoying individual in my life...and that is saying a lot. I seriously hated her. HATE. I hardly ever use that word when not describing cockroaches on my counter, or an unexpected fingernail clipping showing up somewhere where they shouldn't be. Which, in my opinion, is anywhere.

Needless to say, glasses prescription remains an outstanding item on the to-do list.

From there we were supposed to find my wedding shoes. My requirements were as follows:

1) flat
2) not ugly

Unfortunately, we got sidetracked at another local favorite, Robinson's, and didn't find our way to our shoe shopping until later on...but there was some success in that department. I think my "vision" helped, in that I had no vision at all and so I had lots of choices. We'll see if the chosen ones work on Monday. I haven't seen the dress since November, so I really don't remember what it looks like well enough to match shoes to it.

After that, I had a somewhat religious experience at the mall. And this is a mall that would make other malls scoff and feel superior, but today it was on par with Dolphin Mall...the greatest place on Earth (if you happen to have 6 hours to kill in Miami). Lots of fun, spring clothes made their way into my shopping bag and I'm planning to head back for more this week. Yesssssss. I'd forgotten how great it is to have variety. OH, and size medium. Because the inventory on the Rock is limited, stores usually sell out of everything between size 0 and 16 before I get to the store. Very not helpful. It's a terrible place to be of average clothing or shoe size, which I am both.

The cherry on today's sundae was a lunch, put together by my sister (and Maid of Honour), with my wedding party, a favourite aunt and my Mom. It was awesome. It was the first time I've gotten together with my bridesmaids all together...ever...and I was thrilled to spend some time with my best ladies. I love them. They are all beautiful, funny and amazing. And my pictures are going to be GORGEOUS. Well played.

After lunch, Kathie and I joined the sister and her Swede for a walk downtown...which appears to be exactly as I left it in November. Which, in turn, is how I left it in 2002 and that is exactly what I love about home. A few new stores here and there, but mostly the same. The same is what I love. I found a couple of cute silkscreened tops (one of them has a blowfish on it...which will officially be the first blowfish depicted in my wardrobe, believe it or not) made by a local designer who I didn't know about until a few hours ago but I already covet her stuff. It's cute, light, and fun. I also found a great dress...same designer...that is perfect for throwing on after a day at the beach.

All in all, a good day.

Tomorrow, I have been informed, I am being picked up at 9:45 and whisked away to a spa with two lovely ladies, Lai and Heather. How great is that?

Better rest up. Night.

Deal gone wrong.

Many moons ago, I blogged about the awesome laptops that we bought shortly before moving to the Rock. They had everything that we were looking for and they were cheap and they were, we thought, perfect.

Until they died. Horrible, horrible deaths.

In the case of mine, the motherboard simply melted. Done. I came home one day and it was just dead. That sucked. Especially since it happened 4 days after the warranty expired.

And then, about a month ago, Kurt's started making a funny noise so he decided to jump the gun and order a new one and sell the HP before it died too. The saddest part of the story? The night that the new laptop arrived, the old one died. Done. Just like mine.

So yeah...we've moved on to a Dell for me and a Gateway for him. Second time is a charm, right?

Jiggidy Jig.

In just four sleeps, I'll be landing somewhere near here...and I'm pretty happy about it. Despite the fact that the week is shaping up to be head-splittingly busy with final wedding preparations, I'm really looking forward to some ocean air (complete with eau de sewage), some decent coffee (until my naturopath bans it...I have not yet had this particular joy eradicated from my life), and some quality time with my furry friend. No, not Kurtis. He's staying here, enjoying the fact that SUMMER is here! Well...almost. But friends of mine were on the beach yesterday and so I'm taking that as a good sign. We were not on the beach with them because SOMEONE chose to go a little overboard on the Black Seal on Saturday night and couldn't leave the couch. And no, the someone was not me. Oh well...beach days will be here soon enough.

Speaking of Victoria, the other day, I was stalking around realtor.ca (as usual), and came across something that I haven't seen in about 25 years, but recognized immediately.


This was the house my family lived in back in the early '80's and I would love love love to walk through it again, to see what kind of memories it stirs up. I was pretty young when I lived there, but not young enough to notice that the wallpaper in one of the rooms is the same as when we lived there. In NINETEEN EIGHTY FIVE. Hello...wallpaper has gone out AND come back in again during the time that stuff has been hanging on the walls. It's so old, it's new again. Awesome. Anyways...I think the price tag is a bit steep, since the house looks like it's had nothing done to it other than a few walls painted since we lived there. But then again, it's in Victoria...is an overpriced house any kind of a shock? No.

Anyways, back to my trip, YES. More useless aeroplan points for me this coming weekend, but I can't wait to land. There's no place like home.